In the beginning there was... nothing...
...Then Sami startet to tell me some of her story. Now it's past midnight at day 2... actually it's the 3rd nov, and I've just got started. The reaon: problems going away my boyfriend! (oh, I already missed him when I got on the train) We live so far away from each other... Bah... enough of my "I miss boyfriend, I wish he was here"(Well I do!)
Ok. I've just sad down and written about one paragraf... the first for my story(finaly) And I hope it's fine, 'cause I'm NOT remaking it... it has to work. But like I said; It's not me, but Sami who tells the story. I'm just dictating it... tells what Sami tells me. Well here it is... The first paragraf:
Thoughts
Chapter 1 a
She sat in the hall, waiting for her turn to go on stage to show her abilities. That she hadn’t lost the spirit. But it was hard. Now that everything came back to her. She had used her whole life trying to forget. Trying to remove the mental pain, by forcing herself to feel physical pain, not the mental one, that can’t go away. She wish it was possible, but it’s not. The pain will always haunt her as a ghost. Never leave her with a single moment in peace. She wasn’t the only one waiting people had been in line. Some even got here the day before she had overheard someone say. "You can never come too early, but if you don’t get there in time, it might be too late, and you won’t get the part!" It’s strange, that’s exactly what her mother had told her. Never letting her decide what she wanted. Always what her mother wanted. She had nothing to say. And nothing she wanted to say. At the time! So many things to be unsaid. So many terrible things to be unsaid. Never alone. Not even when no one was in the room. Always the thoughts haunting her. Never leaving her alone.
(word count: 207)
I will be happy, if you would give your oppinion about it.
Ok. I've just sad down and written about one paragraf... the first for my story(finaly) And I hope it's fine, 'cause I'm NOT remaking it... it has to work. But like I said; It's not me, but Sami who tells the story. I'm just dictating it... tells what Sami tells me. Well here it is... The first paragraf:
Thoughts
Chapter 1 a
She sat in the hall, waiting for her turn to go on stage to show her abilities. That she hadn’t lost the spirit. But it was hard. Now that everything came back to her. She had used her whole life trying to forget. Trying to remove the mental pain, by forcing herself to feel physical pain, not the mental one, that can’t go away. She wish it was possible, but it’s not. The pain will always haunt her as a ghost. Never leave her with a single moment in peace. She wasn’t the only one waiting people had been in line. Some even got here the day before she had overheard someone say. "You can never come too early, but if you don’t get there in time, it might be too late, and you won’t get the part!" It’s strange, that’s exactly what her mother had told her. Never letting her decide what she wanted. Always what her mother wanted. She had nothing to say. And nothing she wanted to say. At the time! So many things to be unsaid. So many terrible things to be unsaid. Never alone. Not even when no one was in the room. Always the thoughts haunting her. Never leaving her alone.
(word count: 207)
I will be happy, if you would give your oppinion about it.
posted by BGSKG | 12:13 AM
1 Comments:
This is an EXCELLENT start! I like the way you are showing how so many different thoughts can go around in a person's head in a short amount of time.
Post a Comment
<< Home